[SPARK-51519][SQL] MERGE INTO/UPDATE/DELETE support join hint

[beliefer]

What changes were proposed in this pull request?

This PR aims to make MERGE INTO/UPDATE/DELETE support join hint.

Why are the changes needed?

This feature request aims to enhance Spark SQL by adding support for join hints in MERGE INTO, UPDATE, and DELETE operations. Join hints can help optimize query execution by providing the Spark SQL engine with additional information about how to perform joins more efficiently. This improvement will allow users to specify join strategies (e.g., broadcast, shuffle) directly within these operations, leading to potentially significant performance gains in large-scale data processing scenarios.

Does this PR introduce any user-facing change?

'No'. Just inner change.

How was this patch tested?

GA.

Was this patch authored or co-authored using generative AI tooling?

'No'.

[beliefer]

ping @aokolnychyi cc @wangyum @cloud-fan

[UT36104]

@cloud-fan check PR, please. This patch speed up SPJ - test in Iceberg, gain +10-15% performance (avoid sort/shuffle in already sorted tables).

[github-actions[bot]]

We're closing this PR because it hasn't been updated in a while. This isn't a judgement on the merit of the PR in any way. It's just a way of keeping the PR queue manageable. If you'd like to revive this PR, please reopen it and ask a committer to remove the Stale tag!